I had to chuckle this morning. We've been watching J.J.'s numbers steadily rise over the past week or so. Last night we decided to up our Lantus dose and then proceed from there. Whenever we make a Lantus change we're supposed to get up in the middle of the night to check readings. The past couple of months J.J. has been dropping 200 plus from the time we put him to bed, until the time he gets up. Last night, he didn't drop....he went up....and up.....then came down a little. Hmmm.....and we even upped the Lantus.
So why am I chuckling? Because a couple of days ago I wrote a little about anxiety....how I shouldn't fret about this disease because God knows....He knows all the hairs on J.J.'s head....I don't even know that!! The funny thing is....as much as I believe that to the core....I get anxious!!! This morning after I checked his blood glucose level my heart had that little squeeze it gets when, well, I'm anxious!!! My mind was reeling...."O.K....what's happening now? What should we do? How should I dose this morning? Is he sick? Is his pancreas done, caput, no more? Do I have to wait three days to figure out if it's a pattern or should I up Lantus again tonight?" And the questions continued....until I chuckled.....this is an anxiety producing disease for sure!!!
So with each new anxiety producing circumstance diabetes brings into our lives....READ: ALL THE TIME!!!......I'll just have to continue to give it to God, pray, entrust J.J. to Him, then proceed with the best course of action at the moment.....otherwise I'll have a heart-attack in the next year.....or be put in the loony bin!!! (Do they even have loony bins anymore?!!)