for one more day....

I finished reading a book last night!!! Do you hear the applause!!!?? It wasn't the Bible, it wasn't a book about homeschooling or diabetes, it wasn't one of the countless books I read aloud to the kids. It was a plain 'ol fiction book.....adult fiction!!!

I have to admit when my husband bought me the book for Mother's Day I thought, "Boy, is he grasping for straws this year or what?? He must not really know me. I don't have time to read this." So I gave him one of my cheesy smiles and said, "Thanks, hon.....a book."

Last week I was about to demote the book from being a bedroom book to being a lost on the basement bookshelf book. But something stopped me. I felt obligated to read it because my husband did make the effort to get it for me.

And read it I did. For me record time. It was hard putting the book down. Whenever I wasn't reading I was imagining myself back in "that" world. The world of Chick Benetto.

The name of this book is "for one more day" by Mitch Albom . I don't know a thing about the hype surrounding this book, if there is a hype. Or the author for that matter. I'm completely out of the fiction world as I stated earlier. But I do know this.....the author kept me wanting to read more. I like those kinds of books.

Last night as I finished the book I found myself sobbing. Mainly from these lines from the last page:

"I also believe that parents, if they love you, will hold you up safely, above their swirling waters, and that means you'll never know what they endured........"

I felt and sometimes still feel like I failed J.J. by not protecting him somehow from the "swirling waters" of diabetes.....the turbulent life he will lead because of his diabetes. And yet on the flip side I see and know how happy and "normal" he is---mud pit and all---and I know for now I am sparing him some of the weightiness and heaviness. To some extent I am lifting him up....but I wish it weren't necessary.....I wish it were fully mine to bear.

I know my duty as a parent is to prepare J.J. for the whirlwind and swirling waters by planting his feet firmly on the Rock(Matt. 7:24-25).....so when the winds and storms blow and the floods come he will not drown because he has a firm faith. I'll also protect him with knowledge. Give him all the training and information about diabetes he needs to live life to the fullest.

So with that said.....the book was good.....and thought provoking....but a tear-jerker.

As a complete side note......writing notes for a serious blog post while you're on a treadmill at the gym can be really embarrassing if you start sobbing!!